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4 College Coaches the Cincinnati Bengals Could Hire

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The Cincinnati Bengals are days away from answering a question years in the making – who will replace Marvin Lewis as head coach?

We say “years in the making” because, quite frankly, Marv should’ve been out as the HC around the time you were finishing your 2016 Thanksgiving leftovers.

Don’t get us wrong. The team experienced some good with Lewis. Since 2003 when he took the helm, the Cincinnati Bengals won the AFC North four times and made the playoffs seven times.

But they appeared in the playoffs seven more times than they won a playoff game. And that 8-24 regular season record against the Pittsburgh Steelers? It doesn’t exactly put a big neon sign over your head that says “GIVE THIS GUY A CONTRACT EXTENSION!!!”

Part of the recent troubles can be attributed to the Bengals being the youngest team in the NFL last year (25.2 years), and third youngest in 2017 (25.5), So, with all that youth, why not go after a college football coach? Someone who can relate. Someone who can win. It’s been done before with success (Jimmy Johnson, Pete Carroll) and there are plenty of hot names out there.

Here are our top four:

Top 4 College Coaches Who Could Lead the Cincinnati Bengals

  1. Dabo Swinney – The Clemson head coach is a bigger deal in the state of South Carolina right now than Nick Saban is at Alabama – which is saying something. Swinney just captured his second national championship in three years (beating Saban) after beating Bama 44-16. His recruiting classes show how he can recognize and develop talent.
  2. Dan Mullen – Mullen just finished his first year with the Florida Gators. He engineered the biggest one-season turnaround at the NCAA level, improving from 4-7 to 10-3. He gets results quickly. We know a team who could use a quick turnaround.
  3. Urban Meyer – This one is a long shot, but name someone on this list who isn’t. Meyer recruits speed, teaches speed, and puts players in the NFL faster than almost anyone. Plus, he’s a Buckeye guy, having just stepped down from Ohio State. Don’t ask.
  4. Tom Herman – Expectations were bigger than Jerry Jones’ ego when Herman took over at the University of Texas in 2017. It took him a bit to get warmed up, but now, Texas football is hotter than a branding iron. Herman just capped the program’s first 10-win season since 2009 and beat Georgia in the Sugar Bowl.

However this shakes out, Bengals fans will be on the edge of their seats until the new coach is announced. And hopefully, it’s a guy who won’t have fans out of their seats by the third quarter.

5 Things Cincinnati Bengals Fans Should Be Thankful For

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It’s turkey week, Cincinnati Bengals fans! Time to stuff our bellies, thank The Man Upstairs and our people in uniform for what they do, and settle in for the second half of the 2018 season.

Because, for the first time in a long time, we won’t just be watching to pass the time until the draft. No sir. With a few more wins, we’ll be back in the playoffs for the first time since 2015. Just about everyone in the 513 area code is thankful for that.

If you root for Cincinnati, here are some other things to be thankful for.

Cincinnati Bengals Fans, Be Thankful That:

5. The offensive line is doing better in 2018. O-line problems are as familiar to Cincinnati Bengals fans as tiger stripes. But with new line coach Frank Pollack and the emergence of guard Trey Hopkins, we’re starting to be cured of the Andrew Whitworth/Kevin Zeitler hangover. The team is tied for 11th in the NFL with 9 rushing touchdowns and are 11th best in sacks given up (21).

4. Our young receivers are getting their chance. With AJ Green out because of a foot injury, it’s a golden opportunity for youngsters Tyler Boyd, John Ross and Josh Malone to get their names mentioned on ESPN. Boyd’s been making the most noise. He has 756 receiving yards through 10 games. He’s also tied for 6th in the league with 14 plays of 20+ yards. If Ross and Malone want to show what they can bring to the table – and get the paychecks to reflect it – now is the time.

3. You don’t root for the Cleveland Browns.

2. The schedule is friendly … ish. This point actually gets us the most excited. Four of the remaining 6 games are against teams with losing records. We could really build some momentum down the stretch. Conversely, the Ravens have to play Kansas City, the LA Chargers and Atlanta – all with a rookie QB in Lamar Jackson. And if not him, then Flacco and his gimpy hip. The Bengals can’t really afford another slip up, but the Ravens have a better chance to slip.

1. We’re doing better than in previous years. Even with Sunday’s loss to Baltimore, the 5-5 Cincinnati Bengals are still in the playoff hunt. The last 2 years saw them at 4-6 (2017), and 3-6-1 (2016) at this point in the season. Yes, their ’18 playoff hopes would look better with two wins against the Ravens, but Sunday’s game is not a deal-killer. Many players on D think brighter days are ahead now that Teryl Austin is out on his duff. If they can sew up some defensive holes, then we’ll get excited about the playoffs. If not … well, there’s always 2019.

Cincinnati Bengals Midseason Check-In: Awards and Outlook

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Welp, we’re halfway through the 2018 season – and for Cincy fans, things ain’t looking too bad.

The team stands at 5-3, including a win against AFC North foe Baltimore. That’s the best start since going 8-0 in 2015 (which feels like a helluva lot longer than three years ago). They are 3-0 against the teams with whom they are in wild-card contention (Ravens, Dolphins and Colts). Five remaining games are against teams with losing records.

If the receiving corps can hold together until A.J. Green gets back from a foot injury, and the offensive line continues to gel, and Vontaze Burfict quits playing like he’s trying out for the Cleveland Browns, a postseason trip could very well be in the cards.

By the way … some of those players we just mentioned, they deserve mid-season mentions for their accomplishments. Or lack thereof.

Cincinnati Bengals Mid-season Awards

MVP – Andy Dalton: Halfway through the year, Dalton has thrown for 2,102 yards and 17 touchdowns. The latter of those is tied for eighth in the NFL with Tom Brady and Ryan Fitzpatrick. We’re not saying we’d take him over Tom Brady at this point … wait, yes we are.

Surprise player – Trey Hopkins. Offensive guard Trey Hopkins had to show hustle to move up from the practice squad in late 2016. He had to show it even more to earn 12 starts in 2017. Through the first half of this year, he has shown us – and all Cincinnati Bengals fans – that he’s the real deal. Didn’t see that coming.

Rookie MVP – Jessie Bates. Now this is the way to make a first impression. Rookie free safety JB has racked up 60 tackles this year, defended four passes, picked off three others, and scored a touchdown. The last time a Bates was this scary, he was stabbing Janet Leigh in the shower (kids, ask your parents).

Most improved player – Tyler Boyd. Boyd has produced three 100-yard games this year and almost got a fourth against the Ravens in Week Two. His five TDs this year are already more than his first two seasons combined. With 620 receiving yards so far, Boyd is easily on pace to break the 1,000-yard mark in 2018. Now if we can only get John Ross to do that …

Most disappointed in – Vontaze Burfict. Vontaze browned the bed by getting suspended for the first four games of the year for using PEDs. He’s only tallied 17 tackles so far and the Cincinnati Bengals’ defense has fed off that, which puts them on par with the worst Ds in the league. They are 30th in total yards allowed, 25th in rushing yards allowed, and 19th in sacks. Granted, they are tied for sixth with 10 interceptions, so we’ll throw ’em a bone there.

Vontaze Burfict’s Fine Money Could Buy You Many Things

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Vontaze Burfict likes to play football. A lot. Vontaze Burfict seems to get fined. A lot.

His latest run-in, 2 separate hits in the last Pittsburgh Steelers game, cost him $112,000. Considering the opponent, it was almost worth it.

His career list of offenses, which reads like that list from season 2 of The Simpsons where Marge was documenting the ways Itchy and Scratchy were slaughtering each other, includes unsportsmanlike penalties, late hits, spearing, stepping on LeGarrette Blount, and the incident that makes us hope Ryan Taylor was wearing his jock.

Burfict’s total fines since 2013 clocks in at $415,637.

So, if you’ve ever wondered how much you could buy with the total of VB’s bad-boy money, the answer is … a lot.

What You Could Buy With Vontaze Burfict’s Fine Money

For 415,000 smackers, you could afford:

  • All cost-of-living expenses for 9 out-of-state students to attend Arizona State University (Burfict’s alma mater) for a year. Plus some beer money. But you didn’t hear us say that.
  • Burfict’s rookie salary as an undrafted free agent in 2012 ($390,000).
  • This beautiful 3BR, 4BA house on Berwyn Place in Cincinnati, with enough left over for home furnishings.
  • 415 Bengal kittens. Think $1000 for one of those critters is expensive? Mike Tyson spent about $4000 per month to care for his three white Bengal tigers back in the day.
  • 24,755 copies of The Simpsons (season 2) on DVD.

And FYI, these numbers don’t reflect the $4+ million in forfeited pay that Burfict has been docked because of his suspensions. Don’t get us started.

5 Infamous Moments from the Cincinnati Bengals/PS Rivalry

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OK, Cincinnati Bengals fans – the week is here.

The Metal People are coming to town. Even better, they’ve looked as soft as melting gold so far this year. Those from the “pit” are ripe for the picking.

Notice how we haven’t named them yet? That’s because, with some teams, you just dislike them so much that you want to say their name less than Voldemort. And there’s a reason for that hatred. In fact, there are several.

Cincinnati and the pit town have had more than their fair share of run-ins over the last few years. That has mushroomed into a pretty fierce rivalry – one that would give Da Bears!-Packers historic rivalry a run for its money.

Here are five moments/games that have really brought this thing to a head. And made us want to rip someone’s head off.

5 Big Moments in the Cincinnati Bengals Rivalry with “Them”

5. Time to Shine
Some might say this was more shallow than an episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, but it was still fun. Wide receiver T.J. Houshmandzadeh had a great game in a 38-31 victory at Heinz field in 2005. To top it off, he used a Terrible Towel to shine his cleats in the tunnel. We can think of only one better use for the Terrible Towel. Hint: It wouldn’t be the shoes that you wipe …

4. Refereegate
The sting of this one is still fresh. It’s December 2017 and the Cincinnati Bengals are still hoping for a playoff bid. But the black and gold team stopped them cold, with some help from the black-and-white striped team. The Bengals were flagged 13 times for 173 yards (a team record). Many of those were the result of poor officiating. The worst was a BS holding call against Giovani Bernard in the second half that wiped out an Andy Dalton touchdown pass. It was such a phantom call that you half-expected to see an opera along with it. The TD – and the momentum – was officially lost. Along with a 17-point lead, the game, and the postseason.

3. Taking a Knee
The first playoff meeting between the two teams was in 2005. The stakes were high, the tension higher. Said tension reached a fever pitch when Bengals’ QB Carson Palmer was drilled on the second offensive play (in what many people thought was a late, dirty hit) and left the game with a knee injury. Cincy still managed to take a 17-7 lead, but the bottom fell out after that. The Other Team scored 24 straight and won 31-17, paving their way to a Super Bowl title.

2. You’re Late … Again and Again and Again. If you thought one late hit was a doozie, how about a second half full of them? That’s what we witnessed in the 2015 Wild Card Playoff game. Things seemed reasonably calm in the first half. Then the rain started falling … and the bodies. Assistant coach Mike Munchak pulled Reggie Nelson’s hair. Giovani Bernard was on the receiving end of a Ryan Shazier helmet-to-helmet tackle. Vontaze Burfict and Pacman Jones donated 30 yards in penalties to the Make-a-Field-Goal foundation. Even Ben Roth ….Roethles …. Roethlis … Big Ben was pelted with garbage as he was carted off the field after being sacked by Burfict. Where were the WWE superstars to make it a complete circus?

1. You Want Somma This? Well sorry, it’s ours! The 2009 Iron Workers football team allllmost qualified for the playoffs at 9-7. How sweet was it then, that two of those losses were to the eventual AFC North champion Cincinnati Bengals? Because, ya know, without those two losses, Pitt would have made the postseason. Claiming a playoff spot with one hand and shoving your heated rival away from it with the other hand? Ummmm, yes please!